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got a more funny 1 but the funniest thing was more than the joke here it goes a real life joke and a joke...for the senior ppl
THAT DAY IN SCHOOL WE WENT TO THE FIELD FOR PLAYING AFTER WE REACHED THE FIELD IT WAS RAINING SO ALL THE FRIENDS STAYED INSIDE THE BUS...SO THE CAR CALLED 1 GUY AND TOLD EM TO TELL US A JOKE..THAT GUY WAS KINDA SCREWED UP...HE TOLD US INFRONT OF THE SIR...EKDIN EKTA COLLEGE-E NOTUN EKTA MAIIYA JOIN KORSE TA SHOB POLARA DEKIKHA BOLE...ER MODDHE MAAL ASE... AND WE ALL WENT LAUGHIN AND THEN AFTER LIKE 10 MINS OF LAUGHIN AS HE TOLD DAT WORDS INFRONT OF THE SIR....THE SIR WAS GOOD THOUGH..HE LET HIM FINISH THE JOKE...THEN HE WENT LIKE...MAIIIYATA TAR MAARE AISHA JIGAI ----AMMA MAAL MANE KI--- HER MOTHER REPLIES---AMARO MAAL CHILO, TOR BABA AMARE BIYE KOIRA LA TA NIYE NISE, AMARE MAA BANAI FELSE----
THAT DAY IN SCHOOL WE WENT TO THE FIELD FOR PLAYING AFTER WE REACHED THE FIELD IT WAS RAINING SO ALL THE FRIENDS STAYED INSIDE THE BUS...SO THE CAR CALLED 1 GUY AND TOLD EM TO TELL US A JOKE..THAT GUY WAS KINDA SCREWED UP...HE TOLD US INFRONT OF THE SIR...EKDIN EKTA COLLEGE-E NOTUN EKTA MAIIYA JOIN KORSE TA SHOB POLARA DEKIKHA BOLE...ER MODDHE MAAL ASE... AND WE ALL WENT LAUGHIN AND THEN AFTER LIKE 10 MINS OF LAUGHIN AS HE TOLD DAT WORDS INFRONT OF THE SIR....THE SIR WAS GOOD THOUGH..HE LET HIM FINISH THE JOKE...THEN HE WENT LIKE...MAIIIYATA TAR MAARE AISHA JIGAI ----AMMA MAAL MANE KI--- HER MOTHER REPLIES---AMARO MAAL CHILO, TOR BABA AMARE BIYE KOIRA LA TA NIYE NISE, AMARE MAA BANAI FELSE----
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1. THINGY (thing-ee) n.
Female...... Any part under a car's hood.
Male..... The strap fastener on a woman's bra.
2. VULNERABLE (vul-ne-ra-bel) adj.
Female.... Fully opening up one's self emotionally to another.
Male.... Playing football without a cup.
3. COMMUNICATION (ko-myoo-ni-kay-shon) n.
Female... The open sharing of thoughts and feelings with one's partner.
Male... Leaving a note before taking off on a fishing trip with the boys.
4. COMMITMENT (ko-mit-ment) n.
Female.... A desire to get married and raise a family.
Male...... Trying not to hit on other women while out with this one.
5. ENTERTAINMENT (en-ter-tayn-ment) n.
Female.... A good movie, concert, play or book.
Male...... Anything that can be done while drinking beer.
6. FLATULENCE (flach-u-lens) n.
Female.... An embarrassing byproduct of indigestion.
Male....... A source of entertainment, self-_expression, male bonding.
7 MAKING LOVE (may-king luv) n.
Female...... The greatest _expression of intimacy a couple can achieve.
Male.. Call it whatever you want, just as long as we do it.
8. REMOTE CONTROL (ri-moht kon-trohl) n.
Female.... A device for changing from one TV channel to another.
Male... A device for scanning through all 375 channels every 5 minutes.
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Texas Surgeons
Three Texas surgeons were playing golf together and discussing surgeries they had performed.
One of them said, "I'm the best surgeon in Texas. A concert pianist lost 7 fingers in an accident, I reattached them, and 8 months later he performed a private concert for the Queen of England."
One of the others said. "That's nothing. A young man lost both arms and legs in an accident, I reattached them, and 2 years later he won a gold medal in field events in the Olympics."
The third surgeon said, "You guys are amateurs. Several years ago a cowboy who was high on cocaine and alcohol rode a horse head-on into a train traveling 80 miles an hour. All I had left to work with was the horse's arse and a cowboy hat. Now he's president of the United States."
Female...... Any part under a car's hood.
Male..... The strap fastener on a woman's bra.
2. VULNERABLE (vul-ne-ra-bel) adj.
Female.... Fully opening up one's self emotionally to another.
Male.... Playing football without a cup.
3. COMMUNICATION (ko-myoo-ni-kay-shon) n.
Female... The open sharing of thoughts and feelings with one's partner.
Male... Leaving a note before taking off on a fishing trip with the boys.
4. COMMITMENT (ko-mit-ment) n.
Female.... A desire to get married and raise a family.
Male...... Trying not to hit on other women while out with this one.
5. ENTERTAINMENT (en-ter-tayn-ment) n.
Female.... A good movie, concert, play or book.
Male...... Anything that can be done while drinking beer.
6. FLATULENCE (flach-u-lens) n.
Female.... An embarrassing byproduct of indigestion.
Male....... A source of entertainment, self-_expression, male bonding.
7 MAKING LOVE (may-king luv) n.
Female...... The greatest _expression of intimacy a couple can achieve.
Male.. Call it whatever you want, just as long as we do it.
8. REMOTE CONTROL (ri-moht kon-trohl) n.
Female.... A device for changing from one TV channel to another.
Male... A device for scanning through all 375 channels every 5 minutes.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Texas Surgeons
Three Texas surgeons were playing golf together and discussing surgeries they had performed.
One of them said, "I'm the best surgeon in Texas. A concert pianist lost 7 fingers in an accident, I reattached them, and 8 months later he performed a private concert for the Queen of England."
One of the others said. "That's nothing. A young man lost both arms and legs in an accident, I reattached them, and 2 years later he won a gold medal in field events in the Olympics."
The third surgeon said, "You guys are amateurs. Several years ago a cowboy who was high on cocaine and alcohol rode a horse head-on into a train traveling 80 miles an hour. All I had left to work with was the horse's arse and a cowboy hat. Now he's president of the United States."
'07 Lexus GS430
'04 Kawasaki ZX-10R
'03 BMW X5 4.6iS - SOLD
'04 Kawasaki ZX-10R
'03 BMW X5 4.6iS - SOLD
Guru
Guru
din get da jokes...and that is makin me laugh on myself...lol
SHAMSSHAHRIYAR
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A bus stops and two Italian men get on. They sit down and engage in an animated conversation. The lady sitting behind them ignores them at first, but her attention is galvanized when she hears one of the men say the following:
"Emma come first. Den I come. Den two asses come together. I come once-a-more. Two asses, they come together again. I come again and pee twice. Then I come one lasta time."
"You foul-mouthed sex obsessed swine," retorted the lady indignantly.
"In this Country, we don't speak aloud in public places about our sex lives...... "
"Hey, coola down lady," said the man. "Who talkin' abouta sexa? I'm a justa tellin' my frienda how to spella 'Mississippi'."
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Joe shows up at his office one morning with two black eyes. Fred takes a look at him and asks what happened.
"Well," Joe says, "I went to the bank yesterday."
"So?" Fred asks, "How did you get two black eyes at the bank?"
" The lady standing in front of me in line had her dress caught up in the crack of her butt. I thought that must be uncomfortable, so I just tugged on the hem of her dress to get it out. The lady turned around and gave me a sock right in my eye."
"OK" Fred says, "But how did you get the other black eye?"
"Well," Joe says, "after she hit me I figured that's where she wanted it, so I put it back."
"Emma come first. Den I come. Den two asses come together. I come once-a-more. Two asses, they come together again. I come again and pee twice. Then I come one lasta time."
"You foul-mouthed sex obsessed swine," retorted the lady indignantly.
"In this Country, we don't speak aloud in public places about our sex lives...... "
"Hey, coola down lady," said the man. "Who talkin' abouta sexa? I'm a justa tellin' my frienda how to spella 'Mississippi'."
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Joe shows up at his office one morning with two black eyes. Fred takes a look at him and asks what happened.
"Well," Joe says, "I went to the bank yesterday."
"So?" Fred asks, "How did you get two black eyes at the bank?"
" The lady standing in front of me in line had her dress caught up in the crack of her butt. I thought that must be uncomfortable, so I just tugged on the hem of her dress to get it out. The lady turned around and gave me a sock right in my eye."
"OK" Fred says, "But how did you get the other black eye?"
"Well," Joe says, "after she hit me I figured that's where she wanted it, so I put it back."
'07 Lexus GS430
'04 Kawasaki ZX-10R
'03 BMW X5 4.6iS - SOLD
'04 Kawasaki ZX-10R
'03 BMW X5 4.6iS - SOLD
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nice ones arnab!
ok, i just got back from a late night dinner with some friends and they told me this joke that cracked me up. if its offensive, let me know and I will delete it.
So, Hitler was in the board room at the top of a skyscraper. It was almost towards the end of the second world war and Germany was losing. He had maps all over a huge table in front of him and he trying to come up with different strategies to win the war.
In front of him was Himmler, Hitler's first in command. He had a lot of soldiers lined up near a window. He told the first soldier to spread his arms and jump out. He told the second to put his hands on his head and jump. He told the third to point his hands forward and jump and so on......Hitler watched him do this for quite some time. Enraged, he walks over to Himmler and shouts at him, "Himmler!! We are at the verge of losing a war and all you can do now is play tetris???"
funny, eh?
ok, i just got back from a late night dinner with some friends and they told me this joke that cracked me up. if its offensive, let me know and I will delete it.
So, Hitler was in the board room at the top of a skyscraper. It was almost towards the end of the second world war and Germany was losing. He had maps all over a huge table in front of him and he trying to come up with different strategies to win the war.
In front of him was Himmler, Hitler's first in command. He had a lot of soldiers lined up near a window. He told the first soldier to spread his arms and jump out. He told the second to put his hands on his head and jump. He told the third to point his hands forward and jump and so on......Hitler watched him do this for quite some time. Enraged, he walks over to Himmler and shouts at him, "Himmler!! We are at the verge of losing a war and all you can do now is play tetris???"
funny, eh?
Last edited by GTI VR6 on Fri Nov 11, 2005 1:11 am, edited 1 time in total.
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